White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
