Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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