I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
