Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
