Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
