I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
