does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
