Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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