I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize