I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
