I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
