Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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