I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
