My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
she pinky promised me she was 18
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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