the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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