I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
