i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
