Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Randomize
