I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize