She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize