I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
