i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
