Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize