i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize