doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
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