My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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