It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize