i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize