similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
