he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Are we still banned from the library?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize