I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
