we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I need water and some morals
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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