strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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