Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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