so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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