**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize