We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
