I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
