I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
she peed on how many people?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize
