I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
