So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Randomize
