Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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