Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I am puke
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
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