For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
