she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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