we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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