I want to have your abortion
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Randomize
