My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
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