Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
