Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
